Wednesday, October 22, 2008

A point of no return?

Life as a student at university can often be quite overwhelming. Staying away from home tends to add to the stress. I have decided to spend time outside my university campus, away from the hectic and demanding life for at least two hours every week. I thought nothing could be better than spending that time with children in need of emotional and psychological support. Thus, I decided to volunteer at the Boys and Girls Club, a non-profit entity that takes care of children after school hours.

During the 75 minutes of orientation, we were informed about the demographics of children who visit the club as well as a code of conduct that each of us would have to abide by. However, there was one ethical conduct that shocked me. The speaker asked us to be careful with certain children at the club. As some of them might express their gratitude by hugging, we were asked not to hug children in the conventional way. Instead, they advised us to hug them sideways. This statement was saddening and got me thinking about the complexities of life. We live in an open-minded society. Yet, a simple hug can be misconstrued or mistaken as being a sexual assault.

I did not get a chance to react since we were at the orientation. However, the speaker's statement had a strong impact on me. I thought: have children been abused so much that we now have to think twice or feel guilty even when sharing a hug? A loving hug could make the child feel warm, comforted and protected. However, the club explained that some children come from homes where they may have undergone mental torture. Affection itself is being misinterpreted what with society being so conscious about all its actions. Nobody can trust anyone, anymore. A much-needed hug

According to me, nothing can replace a hug, whatever the relationship or equation may be. We cannot continue to go down this dark road. We seem to be switching off the lights as we go, leaving people with no ray of hope. We must seek to help those who are victims of violence. Additionally, we need to assure them that not every emotional or physical interaction leads to an assault. This will secure their future as independent and confident individuals. We need to look out for those who are in need. They could be our neighbours, friends or even family members in need of emotional or financial support. We should help our society regain its confidence in people. One bad fish spoils the pond, but I never knew that just a few could adulterate the entire ocean.

Published: The Gulf News, Dubai on October 10, 2008

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